Wait a minute...

First of all whats up with Miley Cyrus. Lil good girl now turned bad. She was performing during "family time" on TV and she supposedly pretended to kiss a girl? Huh?? Our children (lol) had to see this on national TV during family time where shows like Britain's got Talent, Barney and so forth play. And how skimpy are the outfits she is wearing now? Little leather shorts, the highest studded heels, the most revealing outfits in town. Whats wrong with her? Soon we gonna hear she in rehab. I promise! Just watch. Mashura chaiwo.

Ok, now that's out of the way.

FIFA WC

The excitement is brewing like rapidly. Only a few hours left for kick off. People are wearing their South African soccer jerseys. My colleague has one written "Rude Boy" at the back (take it, take it, take it...). I shall be singing that song in his face till he turns purple. And people are bloody blowing their vuvuzelas everywhere! If I had one also I wouldn't be complaining, but I don't, so until I get one please take it easy on the vuvuzelas. Poor visitors. Their ears wont be the same when they go back to their countries. I wonder what their view on the vuvuzelas and the outrageous outfits will be. But one things is for sure, South Africans are very happy, hard hand shaking people (just for a moment try and look past the crime, the strikes and the xenophobia. I am swimming back home people.) They love to love other people, sometimes. Like for example, people that don't even know you can call you sweetie, lovie, darling, my baby and all that. And I don't mean lustfully, I mean just coz its sweet. If you not used to it you will probably think everyone is flirting with you.

Licence to drive

Not that easy to get in South Africa, if you are not South African ofcoz. Things just seem so hard to just do things normally here with out the officials trying to fish you out. Either its procedure or they just want your money.

Not a girl..but not yet a woman

So one of my close friends is dating a sixteen year old and he is, wait for it....26. No, is there something wrong with me or is this really a no no. Please tell me if i am over reacting. This is just so wrong in many ways. This is how the conversation went. Please note I copied this straight from my inbox:

Him - Remember that 16 year old i told you about? Well....

Me - No u didn't!!

Him - I tried to stop. But she didn't make it easy.
She seemed a whole lot more confident this time.
I guess she went home after our previous encounter and thought long and hard to herself.

Me - Oh my word! You are such a paedophile
I have no words for you!

I will leave it here coz the rest is unbelievable. You do the math for yourself, you will figure out what he "tried to stop". But if I am being unreasonable then drop me one and tell me where exactly I am being naive . I still don't think its good for him to do this, for her sake. But he thinks she is the one coz she is young, beautiful and inexperienced. And she is obviously head over heels coz she is 16. I have so much to say on this but let me shut my trap.

In Other News...

The Apple iphone 4 is out! It is BEAUTIFFFFFFFFFUL!!!
The Nokia N8 is its competitor coz its got a 12mega pixel camera and all that. But I'm more for looks, so I will stick to the ever so beautiful iphone 4. Lovely piece of art that.

On that note, have a lovely FIFA month. I'm not a soccer fan, but I loooove the players. ;)

Words of wisdom - There is no high like the Most High.

xxx

Random stuff

Life is a succession of moments. To live each one is to succeed...


Have a fun Friday

Check out these steps that different genders take at the bank to draw some money

MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window....
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

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FEMALE PROCEDURE: What is really funny is that most of this part is the Truth!!!!

1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake; put the window down.
4. Find handbag; remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside...
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 kilometres.
27. Release parking brake.

Lovely weekend people

xxx ;-)

"Big" fun ...

I been around doin...

....a whole lotta stressing. Normal for a girl of less than 23 who has a whole lotta responsibilities. Like teenagers to take care of and to feed and school all out of my pocket and still pay the freakin rent. Arggggggghhhhhhhhh!

I wont talk about it. I don't want to. Buuuuuut on to more not so depressing things.

My lil sister passed her first term. Putting in mind that she hadn't been to school for a year coz of reasons beyond myself. I'm very proud of her flip. She is so intelligent, ofcoz she can only take after one person....me *grin*

I still haven't taken exercising seriously. I have a long way to go. I decided its up to me now to actually decide if the expansion is necessary. Is it necessary? No it isn't! But i am a food junkie and i don't see it as fair for me to be deprived of my daily cravings. Chocolate brownies...Choc-chip muffins...sadza nenyama (pap and meat), that's like the staple food at home. Staple as in daily we would eat sadza and we would eat rice and the salads pamaweekends, hehehe. Back to losing weight, I need inspiration. I need to be kept away from food. I want to lose weight but I am waiting for it to be a need. That's not cool though, coz then when its a matter of urgency... I don't know how that will turn out. Just keep me in your prayers.

I am finding myself, fashion wise. I like odd things. Maybe not so odd to the fashion maniacs (every girl should be a fashion maniac). Like i just found out I love stockings that are laddering...*silence* Is this normal? I think it is. I also like a formal and casual mix. Like you would wear your high waist knee length pencil skirt and your lady like cute shirt, then to give it a little edge you wear a pair of high top canvas sneakers (e.g. Levi's, Converse, Jack Purcell or whatever) then add accessories like a nice scarf and a huge bracelet and huge loop earrings. Ahhhhhh, loveit, loveit, loveit!!

I could go on and on about the fashion I am experimenting with. Just on the last note (on clothes), I am in love with African fabric clothes and stuff just like MBLS. I love love love what designers are doing with their African fabrics, its hot and very beautiful. I will post a few pics at the end of the post. I just love the way its modernized. Its so in! And i am on the road to owning a piece or two :) :)

Camp this year was amazing. I am blessed to have been there. I saw the lives of youth and adults being touched. I saw amazing growth and definitely God is at work. God is awesome and I just wanna thank Him for all He is in my life, He is "all" in my life. Glorrrrrrrrrrrrrrry! LOL.

On that note, take care and the words of wisdom for today....
"We can throw stones, complain about them, stumble on them, climb over them or build with them" - Unknown Author

And the pics I promised. Thanks to MBLS for her posts that introduced me to Sika. You rock chic!

This is hilarious.

Its last year's Idols contestant. I dont know if she had planned it or she was serious.. You decide.

Oh and enjoy your easter weekend. Im going to camp :)

Untitled Ramblings...

So this weekend was a long weekend coz of yesterday's holiday (I don't even know what holiday it was, human rights or something). They shouldn't call it a "long weekend" coz of an extra day after Sunday. The weekend is never enough, but I managed to get up to a few things.

I tried to make over my bedroom but i never finished. Please tell me I'm not the only one that gets excited about doing something for the first few hours, days or months then the enthusiasm just wears off, hence i have so many thing undone in my life in general. I need to fix that.

But I did my hair and my face. No i don't have long hair, but I shampoo and condition and all that stuff. Its natural and I'm trying hard for it to grow healthily. I try use natural products and its works miracles for my kinky coils. I enjoy doing my hair. I loooove the refreshed feeling I get. I know its not interesting but let me share my routine for those who care to listen. So I use some cheap Palmolive Egg Shampoo and Conditioner, Apple Cider Vinegar, and Olive Oil.


On my face I put "dhaga", i don't know what its called in English. But its that soil like substance that pregnant women love to eat. It looks like clay but it isn't. If you know the name in English, holla. I only know the shona version. Anyway I made a mask with that stuff and yah, i had a mini pampering just for moi! Beautiful I tell you. So effective.

Enough girl talk!

Sometimes when I am going home, I have to use a taxi. My usual means of transport will not be available at that time. (A taxi is kombi by the way, they call them taxis here in SA). In total I use 4 of them. I HATE using taxis by the way. I hate it. Its squashed and there is always that random person that smells like they have never heard of a bathroom. The same person asks if I can please close the window, WHATTTT THE HELLLLL! Then there is that man that is too close for comfort. When he is reaching for his money in his pocket, he stands up and his bum is in my face or if this person is not standing in a moving taxi reaching for their pockets, they are nudging my freaking boob! Coz they are trying to get money from their purse or wallet. I DESPISE TAXIZ! I should just get a freaking licence and save for a car.

So after my 2nd taxi, I get to Jozi. I walk to my 3rd taxi. So while walking, the streets smell like hell. Men are peeing everywhere. People are just walking bumping in to you. And you have to hold your hand bag close to you or else you will walk thinking you still have it when its long gone. But what really bothers me is not only the street vendors that are frying their chicken and cooking pap in the most disgusting unhygienic of places but also the porn magazines and DVDs that are sold on the streets. There is lots of young kids that pass through the place I pass also and for me its unruly. Its not healthy for young minds and its disturbing. I have more to say on this matter, just no time to do so. Let me get back to work.

An email I got - Laws Newton forgot to state


LAW OF QUEUE: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

**********

LAW OF TELEPHONE: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.

**********

LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR : After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

**********

LAW OF THE WORKSHOP: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

**********

LAW OF THE ALIBI: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

**********

BATH THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.

**********

LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

**********

LAW OF THE RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will!

**********

LAW OF BIO MECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

**********

THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last.

**********

LAW OF COFFEE: As soon as you sit down for a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Have a blessed week ;)

Mishaps and haps < (if there is such a word)

Before I start.

Its dawned upon me, when I titled the post, that the word "mishaps" (meaning accidents, mistakes, etc) must be derived from "mishappenings". Then some intelligent geek decided to shorten this phrase to mishaps.. So I figured if there is such a word as "mishaps", then how come there is no "haps"? It only makes sense, well in my head that is.



Just had to share the senseless things that happen in the mind of me. Nerd? I love the term nerd!! I like being called a nerd. Infact if you really want me to love you, chant "nerd, nerd, nerd" over and over again. lol, I cant explain my obessesion with the word (maybe its my glasses). Now let me tell you, my email buddies (SA, Zim and Nairobi) are a bunch of nerds. All of them are Zimbos. They dont like to be called nerds but who cares right, i still do. They come up with the most weird yet intellectual discussions ever. It can even be about the most stupid thing! One of the dudes once said to me that actually most Zimbabweans are nerds. Seriously! I can honeslty stand up and say, if given the platform one day, that 80%, if not over that, of Zimbabweans are very intelligent! There I said it. And its true. So big ups to ZimNerds! Blog raSekuru vaTawanda is one example among many. If aSekuru happens to read this, sorry zvenyu.



Next in line is the fact that I have had three different consecutive colds for the past three weeks. All different flavors. ewwww? tell me about it. This week I have had a nagging cough, thats mild during the day and at its climax at night. Im taking Woods and rubbing Vicks. I love sneezing but I hate coughing!



So tonight I have organised to go see "The Book of Eli" with Mr. Man. It must be an intresting movie. He doesnt know that we are going, but we are. After all its his birthday month and our annivesary month so he gets to get spoilt a little (and Denzel is hot! even though he is a bit old now)








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Any who to round it all up, I wanted to share an email I got. I laughed my head off! Enjoy. (Sorry for the people who aren't Shona). It doeant look organised coz I just copied and pasted it, but its easy to make sense of :)

Hwindi: Yakuzara yakuzara iyi!
•    “Garai 4-4 semapiritsi e-TB!”
•    “Vabereki pindai mukati musangomirizika kunge mweya wetsvina”
•    “Haina kuzara kombi iyi vaberekesi, pindai tiende, mukashaya pekugara muno simukirwa nadriver “
•    “Vabereki ngatisakotamei pa-door, hapana ari kubaya jekiseni pano?”
•    “Musamire kunze vabereki. Zarirayi mukati senhumbu!”
•    “Pindai mese vabereki! Yamudhara haizare, inenge bhawa!”
•    “Vabereki bhadharayi. Isu hati tambe pabasa sa-Macheso”
•    “R5 yako ndeye kuterera music, kombi ndeyemahara”
•    “Vabereki ngatibheje mari dzedu tione kuti mota inotisvitsa kwatiri kuenda here iyi”
•    “Farirai kukwira kombi yenyu iyi vaberekesi! Ndimi maka isakadza!”
•    “Mdara handei, unokwanisa kugara pa'kadoma'(behind driver) apa! Unenge utori bho! Unoto tangira vari kubhek siti kusvika asi mabhadhara mari yaka fanana.
•    “Ah iwewe gara pa'kadoma' apa kana kuti rembera(stand up)!
•    “Hamudi back seat, pane asina kupfeka here ikoko?”
•    “Tinoda hwani asina makuhwa!”
•    “Eh ambuya garai nehalf tikwane tese!”
• “Ngatigarei takabatana semagaro vabereki!”

Standing Passenger (Vano rembera!)
•    Vabereki, ngatifarire kuenda kwatinoroja. Mirai musana nedumbu ngazvigumane.
•    Ah iwewe gara pa'kadoma' apa kana kuti rembera(stand up)!
Commenting on Passengers

•    Hwindi achiwanzira ma-rasta maviri anga ari mukombi—“Aah inga marasta akuwanda kupfura vanhu!”

•    Hanzi mwana wahwindi akabvunzwa kuti kana vanhu vawanda vanonzi chi-i, akati SHURA!

Passengers
•    “Mukwasha mandigarira!”
•    “Mukwasha, bvisai ruoko rwenyu ipapo!”
•    “Mukwasha, ndisiei pa 'no stopping' mukwasha!”
•    '”Mukwasha ndisiyeiwo pama sewage”
•    “Kombi imarii mkwasha?" Hwindi: "Munogona kuitenga here kombi iyi mbuya?"
•    “Hwindi kuna driver 'tsika chepakati (brake) shamwari, paita shura!”

Final Destination
•    “ Mari yenyu yaperera pano vabereki!”
•    “Ngatibatanidzei vabereki nevaberekesi!! (pay time)
•    “Ngatiburukei vabereki kombi yasungwa iyi”
•    “Vabereki musaite kunge ma-tourist itai muchiburuka”
•    “Chii chirikuitika umo, ehh vabereki pedzai kugeza vamwe vapindewo?”

Have a blessed day

xxx